Pedantic Topgolfer Aaron Parnowsky demanded a mulligan on Tuesday evening, claiming his friends were “laughing, drinking and purposefully having fun” while he was taking a shot.
“There was me, taking the game as seriously as possible, doing my absolute utmost to win, as is the whole point of Topgolf,” Parnowsky seethed in disapproval, “And on the other hand, there were the idiots whom I (previously) considered my "friends", nattering away in the background and deliberately enjoying themselves while there was still a game on the line.
“It’s one thing having a coca-cola and a quiet chit-chat after the match has finished, it’s quite another shouting “Miss it, you chump" and "We don't want to hang out with you anymore, Aaron" after I’ve treated them to a full two minutes preparation lining up the perfect chip.
“Topgolf were good enough to award me the game retrospectively, although apparently although Harry Kane is expected to lodge an appeal for 1st place.”
Parsnowsky’s topical jokes are believed to be as behind the times as his attitude to a night out with friends.